Advice on dating as a single mom
Through my circle of friends and single moms I meet through this blog, I often hear cries of horror about the thought of single mom dating. What man in his right mind would date someone with so much baggage? Whether the single part was by way of divorce, breakup, death or choice, it was a big deal, and that changed you. I have lunches to make and doctor appointments to schedule. Busy single moms have fewer lonely nights to fill, fewer dinners eaten alone. My single-mom body is a wreck and I haven’t been on a date in 15 years! I am also far less critical of other people, including men. 3) You’ve faced the reason-defying triumphs that are required of single motherhood. I’ve spent the past three years dating as a single mom – including a year-long relationship—and let me tell you something: there is no better time than to date than as a single mom. When I was dating in my twenties, I was looking for a husband with a healthy set of testicles with which to sire children. The pressure is off as a single mom.…and that makes you a delight to be around. So many disappointments, self-blame, and broken hearts. Since becoming a single mother I have found that I am so much less judgmental of myself. 1) you became a parent, which will blow your mind, heart and life in incredible ways, and 2) you’ve found yourself single after a serious longterm relationship. I can check that off my life to-do list and look for a man for love or companionship or sex – or all three. This kindness bleeds into your other relationships. Being a single mom means that you have been through at least three life-altering experiences.Don’t Date your Ex’s Opposite – The tendency after a relationship ends is to rebound with someone who has all the qualities that your ex lacked.I'm a newly single mom, I'm 40, I'm at my sexual peak and I want a partner, a long-term life partner. More particularly, how do I meet people with a stroller in hand and/or tell people I've got an amazing three-year-old kid I'm committed to raising (well). As for online dating, I don't want to attract predators, I'm concerned for my daughter's wellbeing.Because if the stars all align, LSBG, you could find yourself in the right-guy-place at the right-guy-time.
But today, I had that ‘cry in the car’ kind of day, and each of my friends and siblings have done their patient duty of listening to me prattle this already month, and now it’s your turn, dear readers.
Try getting a new wardrobe (or a few pieces) or starting a new workout routine. I recommend carving out 2 to 3 hour 'dates' every week that you can use to see someone new, go to a singles mixer, or browse dating sites.
Also, don't forget to schedule relaxation and alone time for yourself! Ask For Introductions – Many single moms are shy about letting people know they are single and ready to mingle.
I also want to be transparent without men running for the hills. In your case, MOM, there's an added little twist that happens to be a living thing that poops and cries and takes up a lot of your energy/focus/love right now and will one day break your heart.
I have no idea how this is done in person or online. Finding the right man to fit your wants/needs/desires/fantasies is hard.